On Motivation

     I once had a Drill Sergeant tell me that false motivation was better than no motivation at all. He was a very kind man who quoted 'The Princess Bride' and who compared me to Professor Xavier when was I afraid that I would be an unfit Platoon leader after sustaining a fairly serious injury during training. He never yelled at or embarrassed or put anyone down and for this we were grateful. We respected him. He motivated us by encouraging us, and when that was not enough, he told us to "buck up" and fake it and if we faked it long enough, perhaps we would find that it would become natural. Like being motivated could be a learned behavior. This was a revolutionary concept to me and it is one that has served me well.

     I've taken a thirteen day hiatus from writing because I have had no motivation, fake or otherwise. The problem with faking motivation is that it takes discipline in the beginning and I've been doing well to trudge through my daily life and to fall in bed at the end of it while trying to not think of the all things that I need to do, let alone want to do. I'm spread thin. Not time wise, really, but emotionally. I'm drained and I've let slide the things that make life enjoyable and worth living, leaving me in the midst of a pretty bleak existence.

     I love to write and this project is cathartic, but lately I have felt blocked. I'm writing about my life and I'm blocked! This is a problem. I've had moments of true, unabashed motivation and inspiration and in these moments I decide that I will write one, two times daily. I'll write inspiring posts that make others want to join in. Millions of subscribers will be helped and encouraged daily and they will add to the collective stories of others and they will reconnect with people they lost touch with ages ago, or seek solace in the words of others, or turn a new leaf and find the courage to change their lives. And then I sit down at the computer to write my world-changing posts and it goes something like this:

     Check email. Open Blogger. Tap pen against teeth. (I keep a pen at hand because I write notes on paper to help me think. I'm old school that way.) Go over notes for inspiration. Check Facebook. Make up title for post and realize that I don't even know what I'm going to write about. Delete title. Look at cute animal pictures on internet. Close Blogger. Look at more cute animal pictures. Feel guilty for not writing and promise myself that I will write two posts tomorrow.

     The conclusion I have come to is that motivation, in any form, is essential to progress but that follow-through is just as important and in fact, may be even more important in the long run. I am learning that I need to grasp onto those rare bursts of motivation and inspiration and make the most of them but if I'm not productive for a period of time, it's not the end of the world. I will be disappointed in myself but the world will not end. People will not be hurt and no harm will be done. If I am able to stay motivated and productive, perhaps more people will read and contribute to my blog and this will further motivate me. It's a cycle, but not a vicious one. My personal challenge is to is get so good at faking motivation that I can pull it from the depths of me whenever I need it. I want to be a motivation generation. For myself and for others.

     "It's not what you accomplish in moments of inspiration, but rather what you do in between those moments that counts."

     I can't find the author of this quote but is pure truth.